Open Letter To My Ex

10/22/17 | Dating, Forgiveness, Freedom, God's Timing, Love

Hello Stranger,

It’s been a while and I have quite a lot of things to say, seeing as though I never got the last word.  

As I’m staring at this blank page, I’m waiting for all the emotions to well up and all of my secrets to start pouring out.    

First of all, I want to thank you.  Don’t flatter yourself too much, though.  I just want to thank you for allowing me to separate myself from you before we destroyed each other’s egos.

At the time of our breakup, I felt like my world was shifting.  There was a ringing in my ear as you said the very words I’ll never forget.  You stepped on my heart and shattered it, leaving me to pick up broken pieces of glass that kept tearing at my flesh that was so desperately trying to repair itself after months for being picked-at scab.

After much time apart filled with heart healing, soul searching, and prayer, I can truly say that the sound of your name does not make me cringe, or that I regret having known you, or that I wish awful things would happen to you.

If anything, I hope all is well for you.    

But sometimes when I think of you, I wonder what went wrong with us…

In the beginning, you showed me that chivalry isn’t dead and that somewhere in this age of progressive f-boys, gentlemen do exist.  You reminded me that it was okay to let my guard down, and to be my true authentic self.  You showed me a love that I thought I would never know.

But as time went on, I think we were growing into what we wanted to become, and our paths were unaligned for each other.  We kept trying to hold on for the sake of time, not for the sake of genuine love.

So many times you wiped away my tears, not realizing that most of the time you were the cause for them.  You promised me that you’d never hurt me, but I continuously found myself feeling broken, unworthy, and unloved.  I prayed to God to send me a love that I cannot refuse or not recognize, and somehow, He took you away from me.  

It took me a long time to reflect on what went wrong so I can pick up the pieces of my life and learn to trust again.  It took me learning how to love, trust, and forgive myself to no longer feel pain when I think of you.

Anyways, I hope that our love was genuine, and that you find love again in this lifetime.  Although you’ll probably never read this, or we’ll never speak to each other again, I wish you nothing short happiness.

 

Love Always,

Your Long, Lost Best Friend

 

P.S. – I forgive you, and I hope you can forgive me too.